I’m Not Playing By Hustle Culture Rules Anymore

I grew up with some very traditional views of career success. Work hard, prove your value, and rise to the top.

My dad began his career as a social worker and eventually became the CEO of a nonprofit. I spent my college years working at a bank, watching smart loan officers work long hours and enjoy the commission they’d earn. I was surrounded by examples of white-collar career acceleration… no matter the cost, it was worth the financial freedom and power it would bring.

Like many women, I read Sheryl Sandberg’s 2013 book Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead. At the time, it was a rallying cry. Sandberg wrote, “Don’t expect that you’ll get to the corner office by sitting on the sidelines.” Women needed to assert themselves and know their value.

While Sandberg brought up some very real issues around gender disparities in the workplace, she was also reaffirming many concepts of hustle culture. Play by the rules, and you’ll climb the ladder. Her central argument was that women should demand that the rules be equally applied.

But what if the rules of the game have been grinding us into the ground?

Sandberg argued that women should demand a seat at the table. It perpetuates the existing structure of work.

Instead, the argument should have been, “The table itself isn’t compatible with life.”

Work is no longer about compliance

After college, I took a job at a small software company. My mentor was a Gen X woman. She’d followed the exact path that I wanted for myself: her hard work was recognized and she held an executive role at the company.

I expressed my desire to follow a similar path. I worked hard to outshine my colleagues and praise was heaped upon me. I worked long, long hours and volunteered to take on additional projects. I wanted to be indispensable.

It worked. I was given promotions and eventually landed my “seat at the table.”

Except the table wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. The other executives held dear the same traditional concepts of work. They demanded loyalty, compliance, and a “yes-man” mentality. My mentor coached me to pander to the CEO so that he’d like me more and taught me not to be too direct with my ideas, lest he immediately reject them.

I played by all the rules. I am a Millennial who saw layoffs during the 2008/2009 recession. Like many in my cohort, I valued job stability. So I never questioned the requirements of climbing to the top.

Until the pandemic hit.

It was like a wake-up call for many people. Suddenly, we realized, “Wait, we don’t have to play by these rules. This way of working is broken.”

Enter The Great Resignation. Many, many companies had moved beyond this brand of toxic work culture — and they were hiring.

Passions can exist alongside work

The past few decades of work have seen a rise in calls for work-life balance, but this was often code for “work life” and “family life.” You devoted your energy to work and family — leaving little in the tank for individual pursuits.

It’s an extension of the hustle culture mentality. If you had something extra to give, you should give it to your job or your kids — because those were the things that mattered.

But the pandemic upended many ideas about traditional work-life balance. Part of The Great Resignation’s mass exodus included people who pursued a solopreneur or freelancing life. Nearly 50 million people in the U.S. identify as independent workers who don’t have any employees.

And people are also turning their passions into work — whether part-time or full-time. A report by Linktree found that 66% of creators consider themselves part-time creators, and 43% spend less than 5 hours per week creating content.

On the one hand, the rise in freelancers, solopreneurs, and creators is a rejection of the traditional work structure. Side hustles are also about diversifying and protecting yourself from being “stuck.” The more options you have, the less you’ll feel married to a specific job. That might include quitting a job before you have a new one lined up, taking some time off, or taking a lower salary/less stressful job because you have supplemental income.

On the other hand, people are pursuing their passions simply because it makes them happy. They enjoy creating or spending more time with hobbies. Free time has been reallocated from “putting more time into your carer” to “putting more time into yourself.”

There is power in saying “no”

Hustle culture pushes us to say “yes” to everything.

It’s practically a requirement. In order to move ahead, you have to pour everything you have into a job. If you’re not saying yes, you’re falling short.

But that constant push leaves no time to rest and recharge. It can impact physical and mental wellness, and lead to burnout. Hustle culture often forces people to put the work first, and put themselves last.

In the article “Have We Been Thinking About Burnout All Wrong?” writer and educator Eve Ettinger says:

Sometimes the only way to fix a broken system, it seems — to move toward a restorative approach to sustaining ourselves and our labor — is to refuse to play by the old rules. Work is good, but I am not my job.

This mental shift is at the core of saying “no” to hustle culture. It’s about putting boundaries between self and work. Good work can still be done, but it shouldn’t be all-consuming.

Hustle culture also removes power from the individual, since you’re forced to play by the go-go-go rules to get ahead. Saying “no” is taking power back. You can go to work, do the work to the best of your ability, and then disconnect.

Career ladders aren’t the only path

Hustle culture is built on chasing the “next move” — but the trajectory is always UP. The next promotion, the next salary bump, the next fancy title… it’s always about climbing the ladder to success.

Leaving hustle culture behind means that you have to remove the link between leveling up and your sense of worth. By no means does it mean your work is mediocre, but you’re setting limits on what you’re willing to give.

Leveling up often means new responsibilities — and that can be hard to give up, especially if you’re a person who enjoys a challenge. If you find that you want to take a step back and still be challenged, consider taking a class or getting involved in a community organization.

When I hit the point of burnout, I did a complete career pivot. I left an executive-level job, and I didn’t chase a similar role. Instead, I found work was enjoyable and challenging, but also required less energy. I have more time for my creative pursuits. And I’m far happier as a result of this change.

You can read about the future of work and career pivots on my Substack.