Build Better Routines by Anchoring to What You Already Do
A practical approach to routines that fit your real life.
Most self-improvement advice sounds great in theory. Read 10 pages a day. Journal every morning. Wake up at 5 a.m. Meditate for 20 minutes.
But here's what that advice almost always skips: where does it fit in your day?
If you're a parent, self-employed, working, or juggling a life that doesn't follow a neat 9-to-5 pattern, generic routine advice falls flat. It's not that the habits themselves are bad, but nobody tells you how to actually make them work when your schedule is unpredictable.
Building a sustainable new routine or habit isn't about willpower (despite what the "experts" tell you). Instead, you need to focus on anchoring new habits to things you're already doing.
TL;DR: Self-improvement advice fails when it assumes a predictable schedule. Instead of building new routines and habits from scratch, you should anchor them to things you already do and then layer on gradually.
Why most self-improvement advice doesn't work
Most habit advice also asks you to create something entirely new, like a brand-new morning routine or a dedicated block of time carved out of nowhere. That works for some people. But for many of us, it creates more friction and frustration than progress.
I'm a parent, so a lot of my daily schedule is focused on my kids. And that schedule changes, depending on the time of year. When your Tuesdays look nothing like your Thursdays, the "wake up at 5 a.m. and follow this 90-minute morning routine" advice isn't practical.
That's where anchoring comes in.
An anchor is something you already do every single day without thinking about it. Brushing your teeth. Walking the dog. Picking the kids up from an after-school activity. These are your non-negotiables — and you can "attach" something new to them.
Instead of building a routine from scratch, you build on top of what already exists. The anchor gives the new habit a home in your day, even if the time varies from day-to-day.
5 steps to build better routines with anchor habits
Anchoring works because it removes the biggest barrier to forming new habits: figuring out when to do them. You only need something you already do consistently, rather than a perfect schedule.
Here's how to put anchors into practice.
1. Start with what you already do
Look at what's already built into your day. These are the things you don't have to think about — they just happen.
For example, I have a specific daily ritual. I drink coffee every morning as soon as I wake up. And then I sit with my laptop in the kitchen and write until my kids wake up. I hate alarm clocks, so the exact amount of time is different every day, and I'm ok with that.
My anchors are waking up and drinking coffee, and my newly-formed habit is writing. Not "writing for 30 minutes." Just writing with whatever amount of time I have, and being ok with that.
The key is intention. If you want to add a new habit to your morning routine, you don't have to redesign your morning. Instead, you add one new thing to a pattern that already works.
2. Make it trackable (and a little addictive)
There's a reason gamified apps work so well. Streaks, progress bars, and check marks create a psychological pull that makes you want to keep going. Once you hit a certain streak, skipping a day feels almost painful — and that's exactly the point.
In a way, the streak or habit-tracking app can become the anchor by itself. The issue is getting to that point where it feels unimaginable to skip (see: my current Wordle and Duolingo streaks!)
Some experts say it takes around 60 days to form a new habit. Though this claim has nuance, at some point, the new habit stops requiring effort and starts running on autopilot.
3. Stack on top of different anchor points
Once your first anchor habit feels natural, you might be tempted to pile more on top of it. But there's only so much you can stack onto one anchor before the whole thing collapses.
Going back to my morning writing routine: at one point, I tried to add in "meditation" plus "journaling" plus "writing." But if I woke up later, that left less time for my writing.
It was a tradeoff. I could set an alarm to have a fixed amount of time (nope) or decide that the writing was most important and find a different anchor in the day for meditation or journaling.
While you can stack on top of existing anchors, sometimes it makes more sense to find different anchors. You're applying the same principle — attaching something new to something that already exists — just in a different part of your day. This spreads your habits across multiple anchor points instead of overloading one.
4. Remember your "why"
A habit without a purpose won't survive long. Even with an anchor to help you figure out "when," your initial excitement may fade.
If your goal is to read more, ask yourself why. Are you trying to diversify the types of books you read? Do you have a backlog of articles you've been meaning to get through? Are you reading to grow in your career or learn about a new topic?
The "why" has to be yours (not something The Internet told you to do). If the reason doesn't matter to you, the habit won't stick.
5. Know when to expand (and when to sit tight)
Not every habit needs to grow into something bigger. Sometimes the goal is just consistency. You don't want to break the new habit or routine you just added to one of your current anchors.
But when you're ready to add more, pay attention to how the current habit feels. If it's something you look forward to (or at least something you do semi-automatically), that's your signal that you could layer on something new.
Everyone's timeline for adapting to a new routine or habit is different. It could be a few weeks or a few months. The only benchmark that matters is whether the new habit feels settled enough that adding another new habit feels achievable.
Anna Burgess Yang
Common mistakes when building new routines
Even with anchoring, routines can go sideways — especially if you're trying to follow generic "how-to" advice.
Here are a few common things to watch for.
- Not adapting based on your real life. Ignore all of the "ideals" (like the perfect morning routine). Always filter advice through the reality of your life before applying it.
- Stacking too many habits on one anchor. Your morning coffee can support one or two additions, not seven. Spread new habits across different anchor points.
- Skipping the "why." Without a clear reason, a new habit is just another item on a to-do list. When things get busy, it'll be the first thing you drop.
- Going too big, too fast. "Read for an hour a day" is a goal, not a starting point. Start with 10 pages or 10 minutes. You can always build from there.
- Treating a missed day as failure. Give yourself grace. As long as the anchor stays in place, you can pick the new habit back up tomorrow.
Create additional anchors in your environment
In addition to routine-based anchors, which are what you do, your surroundings can nudge you toward a habit. These are environmental anchors — small cues in your physical space that tell your brain "it's time."
This could look like lighting a candle before you sit down for deep work or putting a book on your nightstand instead of your phone. These micro-cues reduce decision fatigue. You're not asking yourself, "should I do this?" because the environment has already answered that question for you.
The best part: once these environmental cues become automatic, they turn into anchors themselves. And you can use them to stack even more habits in the future.
Check out my free guide for creators looking to better manage their time and content across multiple platforms.
FAQs
What's the best way to start a self-improvement routine?
Start by identifying something you already do every day without thinking — like making coffee or brushing your teeth. Attach one small, new habit to this existing routine.
How long does it take to form a new habit?
]There's no single answer. Some research suggests around 60 days on average, but it varies widely depending on the person and the complexity of the habit.
What if I want to establish a new routine, but don't have a consistent daily schedule?
Rather than tying your new routine to a specific time of day, you should tie it to an anchor — which is something you do every day, even if the time varies. If you always drink coffee in the morning, that's an anchor even if "morning" means 6 a.m. one day and 9 a.m. the next.
How many habits should I try to build at once?
Start with one. If you try to do too many new things, it's too easy to lose momentum if you can't maintain the habits. Adding too many new habits at the same time increases the chance that none of them will stick.
What's the difference between a routine and a habit?
A habit is a single action that becomes automatic over time, like reading 10 pages. A routine is a sequence of habits strung together, like coffee, then reading, then journaling.
