The Breakfast Chaos

I remember breakfast time growing up. I was the oldest of three kids. We lived out in the country, a ten-minute drive from the nearest small village and a thirty-minute drive from a larger city. My mom stayed at home and my dad worked “in town.”

We attended a Catholic grade school that didn’t have its own busing available. We could get on the public school’s bus and be taken to a drop point where a shuttle bus would collect us and transport us the rest of the way. It was a very long route since the public school bus needed to pick up every other kid along the winding country roads and houses that were sometimes miles apart. Most days, my dad would drop us off at school on his way to work and my mom would pick us up.

Breakfast was at the same time every morning. I remember my alarm going off at 6:30 a.m. By 6:45, we were all gathered around the kitchen table. Even years later, when I was driving myself and my sister to school, this routine did not change. The only exceptions were early morning activities, like marching band in the Fall and Shakespeare Club that I attended throughout high school, meeting at 7:00 a.m. and the teacher always brought doughnuts.

It was almost always cereal and toast. There was a tiny tv in the kitchen where my mom could watch the news, but never while we were eating. And I remember that the local newspaper was delivered, though don’t have a strong memory of anyone reading the paper around the breakfast table. Likely, because of our country location, the paper didn’t arrive until later in the day.

Now, with my own family of five, our mornings are far less structured.

I have a middle schooler, an elementary schooler, and a preschooler. It now boggles my mind that growing up, all of the schools always had near-identical start times of around 8:00 a.m. This year, I’m facing a middle school start time of 8:00 a.m., a preschool start time of 8:30, and an elementary school start time of 9:05.

The middle schooler leaves on the bus at 7:30, so he is the first to rise. He listens to a snippet of news from NPR every morning by asking “Alexa, what’s new?” to the Echo device in our kitchen.

I’m usually up by 4:30 or 5:00 a.m. and working in my office. Sometimes the 4-year-old appears at my side and I try to keep her occupied so I can finish whatever I’m doing.

I wake my husband up by 6:15 a.m. so he can dress the 4-year-old. The 9-year-old has an alarm that goes off, but he frequently ignores it and rolls out of bed sometime after 7:00 a.m. By that time, his brother and sister are usually done eating.

We have a high table with barstools in the kitchen and that’s where the kids eat breakfast. I drink my coffee and sometimes eat a bagel while standing at the kitchen counter, but I don’t eat with the kids. My husband doesn’t eat at all The 4-year-old frequently thinks that playing is more interesting than eating so she’ll ignore food altogether until much later. And since she doesn’t need to start getting ready to leave until 8:00 a.m., there’s no hurry.

After the middle schooler catches the bus, we have to make lunch for the 4-year-old to take to school and load the dishwasher but otherwise there’s a good chunk of time with nothing in particular to do. The 9-year-old works on his homework. Before it got cold, I would often take walks with the 4-year-old.

Sometimes I look at our mornings and wish that we were all able to sit and connect in the morning. But with the staggered school start times, it doesn’t make sense. On the other hand, the kids (at least the older two) are very self-sufficient: they get their own bagels or cereal.

Saturdays are a bit different. My husband sleeps in on Saturday mornings (and Sundays are reserved for me). I always make blueberry muffins — boxed variety — for the kids. The 4-year-old can always be counted on to “help” and sometimes the 9-year-old will want to assist. While we aren’t all gathered around the finished muffins, at least the kids and I eat at the same time. The kids eagerly claim their muffins when they emerge from the oven and can barely wait until they cool.

So while weekday mornings are crazy, I like our little Saturday morning muffin routine — when we’re not in a hurry and can start the day lazily.