Give Yourself Time to Adapt to a New Routine

Change is unavoidable and an adjustment period is necessary.

Image created via Midjourney

I’m a very routine-driven person. My days run a predictable course of getting my kids off to school, work, and household responsibilities. My time is divided into neat little blocks and I know what to expect most days.

Benjamin Franklin famously followed a daily routine that was broken down into six blocks of time:

5–7 a.m. Rise, wash and address Powerful Goodness! Contrive days’ business, and take the resolution of the day; prosecute the present study, and breakfast.
8–11 a.m. Work.
12–1 p.m. Read, or overlook my accounts and dine.
2–5 p.m. Work.
6–9 p.m. Put things in their places. Supper. Music or diversion, or conversation. Examination of the day.
10 p.m.-4 a.m. Sleep.

If Franklin was able to maintain that routine for years on end, I envy him. While I don’t have the mental fortitude to work in four-hour blocks of time, I would relish the predictability. In real life? My daily routine is constantly changing.

At a minimum, my daily routine changes twice per year: at the start and stop of the school year. I’ve also changed jobs in the past year (helloooooo Great Resignation). My spouse also changed jobs. The pandemic was a huge shift in my daily routine when my kids were home due to remote learning and I had to work “around” their schedule.

As someone who likes predictability, these changes are often hard on me. I get frustrated and feel like I’m always running behind. In reality, adjustment takes time. I’ve learned to give myself a few weeks as I settle into the changes. Sometimes I have to give myself a pep talk, saying, “The stress you’re feeling won’t last forever. You’ll get this new routine figured out.”

Over the years and many, many changes in routine, I’ve discovered a few tricks to make the transition easier.

Figure out the full impact of what has changed

Often, our perception of a routine change has tunnel vision. Does a new job mean a new start time for the day? We see only the new start time.

But in reality, the change can have a ripple effect. A new job might have a new wake-up time, but what else does that impact? Do you need to change your bedtime? Do you have more/less time for your morning routine?

I try to assess how my time is spent when my routine changes. For example, let’s say you usually do a load of laundry in the morning, but because of your new start time, that’s no longer possible. How does your laundry now fit into your overall schedule? Where does it “go”?

It’s those little, cascading changes that can really throw us off — sometimes without even knowing it.

I’m always looking for ways to improve my routine. Sometimes it’s changing how/when I write. Sometimes it’s setting aside time to listen to a podcast. Sometimes it’s picking a different day of the week to do laundry.

Whatever the change — whether small or big — I try to think through how everything will “fit” into my day:

If I set aside time to do X, do I need to give up Y?
If I can’t give up Y, where does Y go?
If Y goes to a different time, what happens to Z?

Eventually, there has to be an endpoint. We all have the same number of hours in a day. Your endpoint might be “spend less time on Y” or “wake up 30 minutes earlier” — but it is an endpoint nevertheless.

I find that I have to be realistic when I make changes to my routine. I have a daily mix of productive and unproductive time. Setting aside time to listen to a podcast sounds great… but will I give up some of my downtime? Is that what I really want? Can I follow through?

It can be trial and error — you can decide on a change, adapt your routine, and evaluate for a while.

Track your routine and your progress

Your evaluation period is a time for observation and reflection. You’re trying to settle into a groove and see how it works.

It’s important to not give up too early. Any routine changes can take time.

Sometimes you can make incremental changes. If your goal is to wake up 30 minutes earlier, start with 10 minutes. If your routine involves exercising 4x per week, start with 2x.

You can use a habit tracker. I love apps, but for tracking changes in my routine, I like to use paper. It’s very satisfying to put an “X” on the days when I maintained a new routine. This download from writer Austin Kleon is great. 30 days is a good benchmark to check in with yourself and see how things are going.

If it’s important enough, I’ll keep tweaking my routine to make it work. I often try to make changes so I can meet my short- and long-term goals. Incremental progress matters, so I’ll often break down large goals into small chunks and make little tweaks to my routine over time.

Then there might be other times when you can feel comfortable abandoning the effort, and that’s ok too.

The rocky part is the beginning — it gets easier

It should get easier as time passes. After a month, I’ll evaluate my progress. Did I do better each week, or was it hard to adjust? If it was hard to adjust, I’ll try to figure out why. I’ll look back at the cascading impact. Maybe it’s still something I want to do (back to my podcast example) but I picked a time of day that just doesn’t work.

The other scenario is when you are forced to change your routine, and this is sometimes the hardest. A new job, moving, or kids starting school can bring about huge changes in your daily life, and have requirements on your time that are outside of your control. And sometimes they’re not little changes — they can be hugely disruptive to your daily routine.

When you have to make a change, give yourself some grace. Everyone involved — you, your significant other, your kids — might be cranky at first. It can make for a rough transition.

During big changes, I have found myself saying, “Wow, this is really awful.” The cascade effect has impacted my mood, my interactions with others, and my sense of stability.

If this happens to you, take a step back.

It won’t always feel so unsettling. You’ll feel out of sorts, maybe even for months. But you’ll adjust.

It’s important to give yourself some breathing room. Take a day off to catch up or refocus yourself if you really feel “off.”

Acknowledge that change is hard and takes time.

You can read more about career pivots (and the resulting routine changes!) on my Substack.